There’s some kinda fatal flaw in my relationship with pretty much anybody. For the past couple weeks all I want to do is get into arguments with everybody. I just want to piss them all off. If I could get one into a physical confrontation, a part of me would actually welcome it.
Especially with…
Tom, I don’t know if this is going to matter or not, but I’m going to say this anyways. I’ve always considered you one of my dearest friends. I’m sorry if I haven’t kept in contact with you lately, but I’m already bad at that and I’ve been going through a lot of stupid shit lately. I do truly miss you and I want to let you know that you can come to me with anything. I feel the same way about most of our friends lately too. It has all become so distant. I really do miss you and appreciate you.
This is about anger, not sadness. I don’t need anyone to come to. I need someone to beat the shit out of.When I said I don’t have anyone to talk to, I meant there’s no one who I’m interested in sharing things with/no one asks unless I post some shit. People showing concern for or interest in my life only AFTER I’ve said something is completely meaningless to me. My friends aren’t even the complete source. I’m just pissed all the time, and my friends are easy things to attach the anger at/spawn more anger from.
No one actually cares how anyone else feels. When people share things, they’re only really waiting for their turn to speak about themselves. “Yeah I understand.” “I get that way too sometimes” “Once that happened to me and blah blah blah.” No questions are asked.
